A Preview of Next Week (un aperçu de la semaine prochaine)

This past weekend, Best Man Justin became Groom Justin ... which means that I got to spend an amazing week in the northeast of France with some amazing people ... and it means that we've got a lot of catching up to do.

What's happening next week on TGS?

1. my best friend gets married (parts I and II)

2. we give away some sweet ass cufflinks

3. we meet this guy

4. we re-define the role of the (Co) Best Man

5. more business with my yankees hat [video included]

6. did I mention that sweet giveaway? [custom engraving included]

and

7. I get back in the kitchen ...

... where the husband belongs

See you next week y'all!

-brian

Co-Best Men: Retracting & Acting like the Coen Brothers

Long ago I wrote a post on this here blog in which I (in effect) shat upon the title of Co-Maid of Honor and the trend of having two people perform the duties of one person. I won't quote myself, because then I'll truly feel like tool, but I may have said something along the lines of:

"Men would never let this sort of thing happen."

::Swallows pride::

A few months ago, my best friend (and former Best Man) Justin approached me about his own wedding ... about serving as Best Man at his wedding ... and about doing so alongside our mutual friend Odin. It was like the birth of a sitcom premise. One wedding, one groom, one role -- two men. CO-BEST MEN.

(I hear that Two and a Half Men time slot is wide open right now.)

Justin (center), Odin and I at my pre-wedding brunch

I love Odin like a brother, I truly do. He was there throughout my own planning process and during our wedding weekend, assisting however he could and bringing humor and a fresh perspective to those tough and tense moments. And while the thought of co-piloting rather than spearheading this project solo still makes me question my manhood, two things stick out in my mind: (1) if I had to co-pilot this with anyone, it would be Odin, hands down; and (2) it's a huge sigh of relief.

It's nice to have another dude to brainstorm with, to bounce ideas around with, to coordinate with. We're each other's checks and balances. We're like the two houses of Congress, only efficient. And being that we're both in the entertainment industry, we have some trailblazers to look up to.

Like me and Odin, Ethan and Joel Coen are a writer and director, respectively, and their partnership has created more works of genius than I care to name.

Ron Howard & Brian Grazer: if this platonic, Hollywood power couple can come together to put out Apollo 13 and Cinderella Man and Randsom and Frost/Nixon and Backdraft -- then I think Odin and I can throw a killer bachelor party. And we'll just hope it doesn't turn out like The Dilemma.

Speaking of which ... there's no better idols for two Co-Best Men than Favreau and Vaughn. From Swingers to The Break-up to the Iron Man franchise, these guys know the value of putting yourself aside and showing some man love.

For now, Odin and I have bonded over the joy in providing Justin with skewed details of our stag weekend (happening at the end of this month). At first we thought that visiting all the bridges from The Bridges of Madison County would be lame, but the idea is really growing on us.

Best Man Duties, abridged and abrupt

While we're here, Tweeting and blogging, sitting at our computers, accomplishing nothing substantial ... Best Man Justin is out there in the world, putting out fires. He's saving lives. He's pulling cats out of trees and such.

His latest project? Counseling future Best Men. And we're fortunate to have him on The Groom Says this morning to share 8 solid tips for successful bestmanship. I'd share his email address but ... well ... there have to be some boundaries. 

- - -

8 Tips for Successful Bestmanship

- by Justin

1) Make sure your boy doesn't go off the edge.  Take him out from time to time to kick back and still be a dude, as the rest of his time will be spent stressing over the hue of doilies. If you're out of town or out of state, give him a call once a week to check in.

2) The Bachelor Party can be anything from a quiet night around the campfire to The Hangover -- it depends on your groom. You just gotta tailor to the dude. Also good to keep the participants in the loop way ahead of time and involved in any decisions that concern money.

3) Make sure your boy is dressed and on-time on the day-of, and if he needs a shot in the morning (and everyone is pretty much better off with one) make sure he gets it and doesn't pay for it.

4) If they entrust you with the rings, guard them with your life. Make sure your pockets don't have any holes. And make sure you have tissues and mints in the other pocket.

5) Ensure that the groomsmen are dressed and on-time and orderly. You are their general. Beat them if necessary.

6)  In terms of speeches -- should they ask you to make one or two -- make em good, make em short and make em sincere. And don't drink too much until after you make em.  

7) On that note -- the speech at the reception should include thanks (if appropriate), instill confidence in the bride and groom's decision, and help usher the party from formality to celebration.

8) You are the secret agent of the wedding, the man behind-the-scenes who handles whatever issues should arise and guards the most important day of your boy's life (the most important day of his wife's life).  Stealthily persuade the drunk uncle to leave early in a cab if need be. Have cash on hand to pay for pizza should the catering fall through. Keep an extinguisher in your suit pocket should anyone catch on fire. 

Above all else, it is the day of the bride.  You are there for your boy, but the best thing you can do for him is to put your energies (whenever possible) to making sure her day is perfect. Stealthily.  

Giveaway Reminder + a word from Best Man Justin in France

Reminder, brides and grooms:

Our The Art of Shaving contest is open until NOON! The winner will be announced around 1PM this afternoon. Just leave a comment describing your (or your groom's, or your hubby's) most hilarious/horrendous shaving experience. Five readers will receive a complimentary Royal Shave -- a $55 value -- at The Art of Shaving!

(See the complete collection of photos on the Joanna Wilson Photography blog.)

If inspiration is what you're lacking, you're in luck! Former Best Man Justin has agreed to share a calamitous shaving tale of his own. You've been warned:

- - -

Those of us who claim to have "grown-up" on film sets learned to pick up the secret film terminology along the way. One of the earliest terms I remember learning is continuity, and I have the scars to prove it.

Contrary to my own quasi-logical dissection of the word (CON-tinuous NUITY-newness), the term actually refers to "continuous unity" -- the continual matching of location, script, wardrobe, weight, and facial hair. Sometimes a film will span the day-in-the-life of a character (a la Training Day, Collateral, Die Hard) but is typically shot over several days, weeks or months.

Another thing about movies that pertains to shaving is where you film them. Film shoots can sometimes take place in the most remote locations with extremely limited resources. I was on one such West Coast shoot when I was nineteen. My peach fuzz was growing quickly enough that I had to shave every day but slowly enough that I was in total agony. All I had was my rusted, jagged, 7-Eleven brand "razor" (issued to every nineteen year-old boy in the suburbs along with a Playboy and a copy of Frampton Comes Alive). And all they had was cold water. Ice cold water.

So what is one to do in the absence of a scented, alcohol-free, three-fold hot towel treatment?

You can't begin the film looking like Leo and end up looking like Jonah

I'll save you the bloody details, but by the third day I resembled James Franco's arm in 127 Hours. The make-up woman hated me. I certainly could have used Steve and his mustache socks back then ... and now that I'm older and more experienced with The Art of Shaving (thanks to you, Groom), I finally have the chops to appreciate such royal treatment.

Bring on the chocolate mask.

Your pal,
Justin