10 minutes on hold with 3-1-1, a transfer to the NYC Marriage Bureau, and this is what I get:
The person you are trying to reach at extension 3-6-5-2 is unavailable. Your call is being transferred to a voice mailbox system. Unfortunately, the person at extension 3-6-5-2 does not subscribe to the voice mailbox service. Goodbye.
I managed to locate another extension on a message board floating through the world wide web, so I called that number. That person did subscribe to the new and exciting voice mailbox service, so I left a clear and detailed message ... though, in retrospect, I might get a quicker response if I were to scribble the question on old parchment paper, stick it in a discarded wine bottle and toss it out into the Pacific.
The response may come back in Japanese...
答え、狂人はあなたの中心に、ある。 あなたの中心に相談すれば方法を知っている。
...but at least I won't feel neglected.
January 15, 2010
January 13, 2010
Guest Blog on myKPW
Dear Readers,
Please check out this morning's guest appearance as part of the new "Involving the Groom" series on the Kate Parker Wedding Blog:
http://mykateparkerwedding.com/blog/2010/01/introducing-brian-leahy-in-the-new-my-kate-parker-wedding-series-involving-the-groom.html
Look out for a new guest post every Wednesday!
much love,
Madman
p.s. Comment below for a chance to win a limited edition Groom Points Scorecard!
Please check out this morning's guest appearance as part of the new "Involving the Groom" series on the Kate Parker Wedding Blog:
http://mykateparkerwedding.com/blog/2010/01/introducing-brian-leahy-in-the-new-my-kate-parker-wedding-series-involving-the-groom.html
Look out for a new guest post every Wednesday!
much love,
Madman
p.s. Comment below for a chance to win a limited edition Groom Points Scorecard!
GROOM GIVEAWAY!
I am thrilled to announce the first Groom Says Giveaway!
With Valentine's Day approaching, you want to show your groom that you care. And not just that "chocolate chip pancakes in bed" kind of care. You want to show him that you get him. That you connect with him. That you understand his plight.
What he needs most of all this Valentine's Day is a Groom Points Scorecard!
Grooms -- Valentine's Day is about love, and that includes loving yourself. Write in and tell me why you think you're the best candidate for your own points tracker. 2 points for honesty.
Husbands, wives, MOBs, MOGs, life partners and significant others -- you're eligible, too.
Giveaway includes:
Love,
Madman
With Valentine's Day approaching, you want to show your groom that you care. And not just that "chocolate chip pancakes in bed" kind of care. You want to show him that you get him. That you connect with him. That you understand his plight.
What he needs most of all this Valentine's Day is a Groom Points Scorecard!
Brides -- make a comment on this post between now and Thursday the 21st at 10pm PST and tell me why you think your groom is most deserving or most in need of his own laminated scorecard.
Husbands, wives, MOBs, MOGs, life partners and significant others -- you're eligible, too.
Giveaway includes:
- 10"x15" laminated limited edition 2010 Groom Points Scorecard
- Expo Vis-A-Vis wet-erase markers, assorted 4/Pack
- Free shipping to anywhere in the Continental U.S.
Love,
Madman
Fahrenheit 451
A couple of months ago, 2E's mentioned that we needed to begin the search for material to read at the wedding. We didn't want to use a traditional poem or verse; we wanted something more unique and more personal. Being the "reader" between the two of us, she thought I might be best suited for the task.
Not the case, it seems.
After reviewing a shortlist of texts that I'd assembled this morning, 2E's has removed me from the post. Apparently, grooms, the following titles are not suitable for one reason or another:
Slaughterhouse-Five, Kurt Vonnegut
A Clockwork Orange, Anthony Burgess
Anything by Edgar Allen Poe
The Road, Cormac McCarthy
Bee Gees songs
No Country for Old Men, Cormac McCarthy
Anything by Cormac McCarthy
Animal Farm, George Orwell
American Psycho, Bret Easton Ellis
In Cold Blood, Truman Capote (I was 100% invested in this one)
Faust, Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (both parts)
The script of Fargo, Joel & Ethan Coen
The script of Barton Fink
Anything by Joel & Ethan Coen
The Scrabble Player's Dictionary
A big upset, too, because I had just stumbled on the following text from Coen's Raising Arizona that would have brought down the house for sure:
"I had a dream. I dreamt I was as light as the ether, a floating spirit visiting things to come. The shades and shadows of the people in my life rassled their way their way into my slumber. ... I dreamed on, further into the future than I had ever dreamed before. ... I saw an old couple being visited by their children, and all their grandchildren too. The old couple weren't screwed up. And neither were their kids or their grandkids. And I don't know. You tell me. This whole dream, was it wishful thinking? Was I just fleeing reality like I know I'm liable to do? But me and [insert bride's name here], we can be good too. And it seemed real. It seemed like us and it seemed like, well, our home. If not Arizona, then a land not too far away. Where all parents are strong and wise and capable and all children are happy and beloved. I don't know. Maybe it was Utah."
Ethan Coen, you slay me.
You too, Joel.
Not the case, it seems.
After reviewing a shortlist of texts that I'd assembled this morning, 2E's has removed me from the post. Apparently, grooms, the following titles are not suitable for one reason or another:
Slaughterhouse-Five, Kurt Vonnegut
A Clockwork Orange, Anthony Burgess
Anything by Edgar Allen Poe
The Road, Cormac McCarthy
Bee Gees songs
No Country for Old Men, Cormac McCarthy
Anything by Cormac McCarthy
Animal Farm, George Orwell
American Psycho, Bret Easton Ellis
In Cold Blood, Truman Capote (I was 100% invested in this one)
Faust, Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (both parts)
The script of Fargo, Joel & Ethan Coen
The script of Barton Fink
Anything by Joel & Ethan Coen
The Scrabble Player's Dictionary
A big upset, too, because I had just stumbled on the following text from Coen's Raising Arizona that would have brought down the house for sure:
"I had a dream. I dreamt I was as light as the ether, a floating spirit visiting things to come. The shades and shadows of the people in my life rassled their way their way into my slumber. ... I dreamed on, further into the future than I had ever dreamed before. ... I saw an old couple being visited by their children, and all their grandchildren too. The old couple weren't screwed up. And neither were their kids or their grandkids. And I don't know. You tell me. This whole dream, was it wishful thinking? Was I just fleeing reality like I know I'm liable to do? But me and [insert bride's name here], we can be good too. And it seemed real. It seemed like us and it seemed like, well, our home. If not Arizona, then a land not too far away. Where all parents are strong and wise and capable and all children are happy and beloved. I don't know. Maybe it was Utah."
Ethan Coen, you slay me.
You too, Joel.
January 11, 2010
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