10 minutes on hold with 3-1-1, a transfer to the NYC Marriage Bureau, and this is what I get:
The person you are trying to reach at extension 3-6-5-2 is unavailable. Your call is being transferred to a voice mailbox system. Unfortunately, the person at extension 3-6-5-2 does not subscribe to the voice mailbox service. Goodbye.
I managed to locate another extension on a message board floating through the world wide web, so I called that number. That person did subscribe to the new and exciting voice mailbox service, so I left a clear and detailed message ... though, in retrospect, I might get a quicker response if I were to scribble the question on old parchment paper, stick it in a discarded wine bottle and toss it out into the Pacific.
The response may come back in Japanese...
...but at least I won't feel neglected.