June 24, 2010


"Wedding, I'd like you to meet my Life. Life, this is Wedding. Wedding's going to be taking over for the next 3 months. Cool? Cool."

99 catapulted me into a mild state of shock this morning. Pulling up the blog, I noticed that my handy Until It Becomes Real countdown clock began with a 0 -- the first indication that this thing is more "real" than not. No longer are we in the three-digit comfort zone. 99 days until we are the guests at our very own wedding ceremony. Christ.

I should have learned something by now, no...? Shouldn't I have some wisdom to impart to those who haven't yet hit the 99-day mark? For those who still find safety in numbers of the three-digit variety?

I guess if there's anything I've learned -- hmm uhh well duh -- it's that you have to move at your own pace. (And yes -- that goes for the girls and the grooms.) Months may go by where you feel like nothing significant is getting done. And then there are those when you look at your to-do list and say, "Oh, that's all?" And we're somewhere closer to the latter right now. It's fantastic. Yesterday I managed to knock out an all-inclusive contact list and a ceremony breakdown.

Boom. Done.

And for us, too -- we've realized that we can't plan a wedding if our lives are in shambles. Whether it's auditions or dishes, we've figured out that the wedding work won't get done as long as there are mounds of silverware in the sink. We need to be exercising. We need to be washing our cars. We need to be going out on Friday nights and not discussing escort cards.

Why? Well, as far as I can tell, it's about balance. It's your personalities -- yours and your 2E's -- that play the biggest part in your decision-making. The wedding will feel and sound and maybe even smell like you -- smell like you on a good day, anyway -- so you can't be planning and designing and decision-making if you're a train wreck. A good state of mind will lead to good choices. Creativity just won't flow in a chaotic state -- not for very long, anyway. Ask any actor, any writer. Ask me. It won't flow.

So you've got to learn to mix it up. Some days you do nothing. Other days you accomplish more than you need to. Some days you talk through transportation for guests. Other days you drive down to Disney for the day. Some days the bride is getting things done; other days she's getting her nails done.

And for 15 minutes every day, do the damn dishes.

Oh -- and take an extra 10 minutes and get in the friggin' shower. This wedding is gonna smell like gym sweat and onions. Ugh.


  1. Very true. Sometimes you need to hustle, sometimes you need a break. I'm thinking it doesn't matter if it's a year away, 3 months away, or a week away.

  2. It doesn't matter at all. Unfortunately, some things you learn a year after you've been engaged.