And this morning I've decided to unveil another role for men who don't quite fit into the traditional planning process -- a position designed for grooms who can't seem to step away from the computer, for those who value email above all other forms of communication, who e-shop and e-ticket and e-finance. This one's for the men who forget that there was a time when we didn't have the internet (What?). These grooms may be playing Farmville at the altar, but that's kind of why you agreed to marry them in the first place. It's not the most inventive name in the world, but we call him:
the e-Groom
Steve's idea of groom attire is a full-on turtleneck and contacts
The concept? There's no need to peel your groom away from the computer when there's a million wedding-related errands that he can run on the computer. No more legwork, men. Check out these e-tasks:
- TheKnot.com - If your groom is computer savvy, chances are he's got a pretty good handle on Excel, Access and all those other programs that typically collect dust on your desktop. So put him in charge of that overwhelming to-do list (find helpful hints and checklists at The Knot and the new Google Weddings website), and in no time he'll have developed a 12-month plan, neatly organized in a spreadsheet that's (not surprisingly) compatible with your iPhone.
- YourWeddingWebsite.com - Give your geeky guy full reign when it comes to the wedding website. If he's proficient in Dreamweaver or any other web design platforms, he'll be in heaven. If not, he'll gladly hunt down the best cost-free option that has the most flexibility with layout, customization, etc. Either way, give the man some direction in terms of design and you'll be online in no time.
- YourWeddingWebsite.com/blog - And as an added bonus, because he's heading up web design and upkeep, he can also be in charge of the wedding blog. (Who the hell would want one of those, especially from the GROOM's perspective?!) Trust me, it need not be revolutionary or time-consuming. Even if it's a one-paragraph entry, your families will love his witty take on yesterday's "tropical wedding theme" debate.
- Target.com - One of the frustrating things about gift registries is that the stores will most likely add, drop and tweak their products in the course of a year (those dinner plates that were teal in March are now purple in November). On top of that, with stores like Target and CB2, there's a whole other online component, and new items are constantly being added to their inventory. So ask your e-Groom to stay up-to-date on new and discontinued products (hint: he can sign up for the stores' newsletters).
- Yelp.com - Rehearsal dinner venue hunting can be exhausting -- especially when your plan of attack is something like, Let's just drive around and stop whenever we see a place we like! Make your life easy and ask your man to narrow the search on Yelp or Citysearch, where he can browse restaurants by neighborhood, feature, cost and cuisine.
- Etsy.com - Don't worry, ladies, I'm not suggesting that e-Groom will assume all Etsy-related responsibilities -- and by responsibilities, I mean you staying up until 3AM, trying to decide which antique birdcage best fits your motif. There are numerous groom-friendly Etsy shops where he can purchase homemade or vintage ties, socks, cuff links and gifts for his groomsmen (and don't forget TheManRegistry.com, renowned man sanctuary).
- Photoshop.com - Between our ceremony and reception spaces, 2Es and I must have gone through a hundred floor plans before deciding on our final two schemes. If e-Groom knows his way around Adobe (Illustrator, Photoshop, etc.), ask him to sketch out a floor plan for you. He can get the measurements from your venue contact and throw in the DJ booth, bar, cocktail tables, dinner tables and gift table as needed.
- Gmail.com - Correspondence is a huge part of wedding planning; sorting through, filing and responding to emails from vendors can be a full-time job. So if your groom excels at e-communication, ask him to be the contact person for proposals, quotes, contracts, appointments and so on. He can create a Gmail account specifically for the wedding (plungetakers@gmail.com) so that you can both be aware of what's happening. He can also take the lead on getting vendor referrals from previous clients.
- Google.com - Based on our wedding experience, I'd say that 90% of planning is devoted to research. We need to find a caterer. We need to find ceremony texts. We need to find a song for you and your mom. Lucky for you, 100% of that 90% can be done online. So tell your e-Groom that you need welcome bags that don't look cheap but are actually really, really cheap, and see what he can come with up. And don't forget to let him have a say in the final decision; after all, he did just spend two hours Google searching "really, really cheap nice bags."
- Flickr.com - Post-wedding, you'll find that more than half of your guests have photos to share from the wedding -- and all of them managed to get you doing the worm in that blurry hour between 11PM and midnight. Ask e-Groom to perform one final, hassle-free task: compile all of your friends' and family members' photos, sort them chronologically, remove the duplicates and share them with the whole crew on Flickr or Shutterfly. Just don't complain when he makes that worm photo your Facebook profile pic.
This is great! Perfect ways to get the groom involved.
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